Monthly Archives: January 2011

What a differance a day makes…


Well, winter is back….it is grey and cold outside. We are due for a couple of days of deep freeze. Not so bad, I guess. At least it warms up for the weekend.

So, with Jill leaving us, I have had a long chat with Katie and Jack. I have asked them to do a bit more around the house. This is a fine line for me. My parents divorced when I was six, which turned my sister and I into latch key kids. My mom went back to school and worked nights cocktailing in a bar. We lived in a dump…I remember roaches and bed bugs in the carpet. Looking back, probably working as a cocktail waitress wasn’t such a great idea for an acoholic…So, anyway, I had a ton of responsibilities growing up. I have gone the other extreme with my kids. So, I am trying to come back to the middle and assign them a few household chores. You can only imagine how well that went over this morning…sigh…

Danny still isn’t sleeping. Hugh has been such a trooper getting up with him at night. I expect that ends today. He is starting to get busy at work, but is trying to not have me do the all night and then all day with out support. I am not sure how long he will be able to keep it up, but I am grateful for a few days rest before the craziness kicks in full steam.

It is time to get the boys bundled up. It is too cold for Jack to walk in this morning… until next time!



Well, we have been up for forty-five minutes and Mr D is hungry. He started asking for fries ten minutes ago, and the ask count is up to six…

I am feeling rested! I was able to run away from home last night with girlfriends. Since Hugh is at work this morning, it is probably my last “run away” until the end of April. And what a fun one it was…out to Kate’s Wine Bar for a snacky dinner and then The Putnam County Spelling Bee in old town Littleton with the seven women in the world who make me laugh the hardest! My face still hurts this morning! Even though I am not as cerebral as some, I, at least, know how to have a good time…(you knew that was going to haunt you, Carrie!) We stayed out until the traffic lights started to blink! Don’t get too excited, in Littleton, that is only 9:57pm….

Hugh held down the fort. He even did the Danny shift last night. Dan’s sleep pattern is all goofed up. He isn’t sleeping, but instead of being a manic mess at night, he is clingy and quiet. Did I mention clingy? He keeps waking up to grab whoever is sleeping with him…I wonder what is wrong…

I moved Mulligan’s kennel to the bed room and we tried sleeping upstairs last night. It was a success! He made it all night without having to be let out…yipee! I think it was the first time I slept all night in my own bed in a couple of months. Between how sick Shadow was, Danny’s sleeping, and then the new puppy, I had forgotten how warm and snuggly our bed is. Bliss!

I am watching sunrise with a warm puppy on my foot. Hugh is already at work, Danny is eating breakfast, and the other two are still sleeping. Time to make myself a cup of tea and start my day!

Watch me, watch me juggle….


Another spring like day today. Not as warm as yesterday, but still just lovely…and then…winter comes back… A high of 6 degrees is predicted on Tuesday. That would be a 65 degree change in four days. What do they say about the weather here in Colorado? If you don’t like it, just wait ten minutes.

I had an interesting morning. I interviewed a young lady to see if she would be a good fit in our home. After four plus years, Jill has decided to move on and get a grown up job. We will miss her, but understand it is time for her to make a change. The tricky piece is the timing. Hugh is a tax cpa and has to “make hay while the sun shines”. Well, the sun is shining. He started working weekends this weekend. In a couple of weeks, he will be in full swing and we will never see him awake. Now, I know people say those kinds of things all the time, but he literally leaves the house at 2:30am to have a quick run in the gym, which is pretty much an excuse for him to be able to use the shower. He is in the office by 3:15am and will work until 5:45pm. That way, he can be home by 6:30, to spend a couple of minutes with Danny before he socks out. Hugh isn’t far behind him, and it all starts again at 2:30 the next morning. He will keep that schedule six days of the week. The only short day is Sunday, on Sunday he will leave the office at noon.

Needless to say, I try to put all of my ducks in a row during these 12 weeks to keep my sanity. Some years it works out, and some years, not so much. This year is turning into a not so much year. Jill has an opportunity to be a grown up, the catch is she must start immediately. I am embarrassed to admit, I did not handle the news with grace and understanding. All I could think of, was “rats, now what do we do? What happened to promising me that it wouldn’t affect us until after tax season was over.”

So, I started scrambling. I think I may have found a lovely young woman who might be able to help us out so I can at least pick up Katie from her cheer practice. It will be a long time before I will be comfortable leaving Danny with her that time of day. From 4pm until bedtime is a rough time of day at Casa Marrs. We have meltdown after meltdown. So, I am not sure how I am going to be able to actually watch Katie cheer. She is taking it in stride, or at least, she is not making me feel like the world’s worst parent. Heaven knows, we have had lots of practice over the years of things not working out as planned…

Years ago, when Danny was diagnosed with moderate autism, I spoke on the phone with a kind parent of an adult on the spectrum who took a few minutes to talk me from the ledge (I pretty much lived at the ledge those days). As I was looking at my butterball three-year old and my four-month old baby, I asked her how she managed to parent her other children while juggling everything. She calmly told me “the child that needs the most, gets the most…”

I am sure typical parents do a balancing act all the time, but yesterday all of the balls I was keeping in the air fell to the floor. So this morning, I have started to try to juggle them again. They are wobbly and I am having a tough time…but I think I might be able to keep most of them in the air…

A 63 degree day in January…


What a gift, a 63 degree day in January! I am outside, on my back deck, in my bare feet. Happiness is going barefoot.

Danny is making the circuit from the back yard swing to the computer in my office. It so nice to see him have some energy! Nothing like good old-fashioned vitamin d to cure what ails you. Typically, you would have to jump on an airplane to get this kind of weather in January. I know the rest of the country is in a deep freeze and this is a fluke weather pattern we are in, but it is like a quick three day trip to the beach…well, if you substitute the noise the children are making while at recess at Shaffer, with the sounds of the surf. But it is close…

What a lovely day!

Another lovely sunrise…


I am sitting here watching the sunrise out of my kitchen window. I love sunrise, no matter what kind of day you had yesterday, here comes the sunrise and a fresh start.

Today is the twenty-fifth anniversary of the Challenger Shuttle explosion. I spent many of my growing up years in Florida. I was a senior at Martin County High School and I was on my way into the McDonald’s for lunch (we had open campus), when I saw it happen. Stuart is about 100 miles from Cape Canaveral and you could see all the launches if you stepped outside.

A lot has happened in the last twenty-five years. Some choices I made were well thought out, some not so much. There are choices that you know are life altering when you make them. And then there are others that you only recognize as important when you are a few years away from them.

Things are good in Casa Marrs this morning, Danny is feeling better by the day, I was even able to get a bit of breakfast in him this morning. Katie and Jack are doing their morning routines before school. Mulligan is crashed out on his pillow. Hugh is off to work, and will probably start working this weekend (he is a tax cpa). The weather is supposed to be blissfully mild.

I am ready to carpe diem….



For those of you who know me, I am a bit of a control freak. Ok, my dear friend Christina, would be quick to point out, that a “bit” is saying it lightly. I didn’t used to be this way. I used to have more of a “the sun rises…the sun sets” attitude. I blame it on our home therapy program. While the intensive intervention did amazing, wonderful things for Danny and his future…it totally morphed my typed b personality to a type a.

So toothpaste. I think the world is divided into two parts. people who put the cap back on the toothpaste and those who leave the cap off. I am a “cap on” kind of gal. I married a “cap off”. Hugh and I cannot share toothpaste and ridiculously enough, that was a major annoyance in the early years of our marriage. The strange thing, I am raising two “cap off” children. I am sure there are psychological reasons for that, you know, the “I will not be like my mother” at all costs reasons…

I am glad…but shh, don’t tell them. I am glad to be raising independent, strong people. While it is a major pain in the fanny trying to discipline them, I am so very proud of them and the people they will be. So… I don’t clean the bathrooms while they are home. That way, they can’t hear me grumble about how yucky and unsanitary and just down right gross I think leaving the cap off the tooth paste is.

I spent a lot of my growing up years in Florida…I wonder if it has anything to do with my irrational fear of bugs that may be in my house…?

….by the way, Dan is feeling better today ūüôā

Thanks Jill! he is eating!


I can feel my blood pressure going down. He is eating the fries that Jill dropped off. He is also drinking. I don’t know if it going to stay down, but at least he is drinking. No trip to the pediatrician tomorrow, yay.

On top of everything else, Danny has a compromised immune system. His body doesn’t develop antibodies against any illness he picks up. Hopefully, once we get him better, we can keep him away from other illness so he has the time to build up his reserve again. Although, as often as not, one of us will come down with it and re-infect him. Those are the times we run into trouble, and skill loss.

So, I am throwing everything I can into the clothes washer to sanitize…the bleach is out…I have windows open… hopefully we can nip this in the bud!

Dan is sleeping


He is sleeping and the fever is down, but still hasn’t eaten or drank anything…still dry.

I have a call into his pediatrician to arrange for him to go in for a bag tomorrow if he needs it. He has gained some nice weight this past year, so he has more reserve than he has had in the past. I have ordered groceries to be delivered, because none of us should be in a germy grocery store while he is fighting and/or getting over something. So that is as much I can do to satisfy my inner control freak.

Bless Jill, she is swinging by today with some Chick-fil-a fries to try to tempt him to eat.

On the glass is half full side, we have booked our plane tickets for DC for next Halloween. Hugh is running the Marine Corps Marathon again this year if he can get a number next week. After such a successful trip to Chicago last summer, it should be fun to take the kids to the Smithsonian. Danny just loves art, architecture, and being in different places. Hopefully we can make a day trip to the ocean while we are there (for me…) So, the Marrs family is training for a marathon again this summer…yipee?!

We are sick…


Well it’s 2:30am and I am up with both Danny and the puppy. Yesterday, it could have gone either way, he was either just not sleeping because he wasn’t sleeping, or he was coming down with something.

I set him up last night in my office. All of his treasures, his favorite movie, all of his blankets…everything. I am sleeping in the back of the house because of the puppy and it is easier for me to get to him if I hear him in the middle of the night. I also put him down here, instead of his room, because I am worried about his fluids. Yesterday, he stopped eating, and stopped drinking later in the day. You could tell he was nauseous, and he vomited a little bit a couple of times.

So, I put the puppy out, gave him a drink of water, sang I love you a couple of times, put on his favorite movie, and watched him fall back asleep. He was still dry… maybe later today we are off to the ped for a bag of fluids….rats.

It’s 7:10am. Hugh is off to work, Katie is up and in the shower. So far, he has kept down some zophran and prevacid. I have a bit of advil and carnatine for him to take waiting for his tummy to settle down, and hopefully we can avoid the doc’s office today. But he is still dry…shoot.

I will update later. Cross fingers.

What a crazy busy day…


And it is only 9am…everyone is out to start their day and Danny and I are hanging out. My day started last night at 10:45 when Danny came down to hang out. When he has a bad dream or isn’t feeling well, his place of choice in this house is my office. I am not sure why he gravitates there, but he does. And when he doesn’t feel well or is worried, there is no moving him out of there.

The puppy has his days and nights mixed up, so we hung out. He would whine and cry every time I would walk out to check on Danny and wag his bottom when I would come back in.

Hugh caught a nap at 4am for a couple of hours so he could do a tax return with his eyes open. Dan and I had a snuggle on the floor of my office and he caught a quick nap. Katie and Jack got up to wear the puppy out before school. Katie was off, Hugh was off and it was Jack and I.

Jack and I had a long talk this morning. He is feeling a little lonely in class this year. I reminded him that not everyone he would meet would become his friend and that was ok. We talked about not giving the kids who aren’t his friends the power to hurt his feelings. I am hoping he learns this lesson before I did.

Made him breakfast and lunch, he got dressed and ready for school. Dinner is in the crock pot, Danny has breakfast, puppy is socked out on the floor…I need a shower… it’s 9:10am…